I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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