eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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