Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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