How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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