God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
