Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize