Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
