she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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