I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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