Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
