the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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