This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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