Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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