Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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