big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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