She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
