You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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