Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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