Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
