i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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