that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize