Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
