I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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