You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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