Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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