I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
