with your own penis?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
