It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
