Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
