Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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