I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
