At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You were trust falling into bushes
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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