yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
PANTIES FOUND
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