don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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