shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
