are you so shy because you have an std?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
