she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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