Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Randomize
