I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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