end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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