The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
