He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
