There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
...so i touched it.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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