That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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