Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
