HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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