Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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