Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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