Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
