Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
