She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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