We're like a lot better than the average bears
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Watching her eat just hurts me
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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